Do you ever just wish you could go back to a time before you knew that the world wasn’t perfect? When you didn’t know about serious illnesses, or natural disasters, or criminals or the possibility of ghosts? When the world was just rosy and nothing could darken your viewpoint of everything, and everything always looked so bright?
Me too. I sometimes wish that I was oblivious to everything bad that happens in this world, and wasn’t aware that anything bad could actually ever happen. But then I think, if I wasn’t aware then I wouldn’t be able to do anything to help. I wouldn’t be able to help people when they feel down, or wouldn’t be able to donate to charity, or give blood like I am doing next month.
So, I guess there are positive points to both sides. On one hand, I don’t witness the bad things that happen. On the other, I wouldn’t be able to influence a change in the world like I so want to do.
I think when I first realised that the world wasn’t actually how I pictured it to be was when I realised that my brother had Anorexia Nervosa. I was 12 years old and nothing bad had really happened to me before then, apart from struggling with Anaemia. But anyway, my brother was admitted into hospital one night and if he had gone another 24 hours he would have died. That is one terrifying thought.
He was admitted into an eating disorder hospital for months and months, and he got the help he needed. But it was a truly difficult time for both me and my family and I think that was when I started to think “the world isn’t all good.”
But there was a happy ending. After years, my brother got better. He still has those tendencies, which is expected, but he’s better. So I suppose the world can still be good, we just have to deal with the bad first.